


i will write the stars for you

by Ravens_World



Category: 9-1-1 (TV)
Genre: Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Family Feels, Gen, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-01
Updated: 2020-12-01
Packaged: 2021-03-09 19:35:23
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,108
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27811603
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Ravens_World/pseuds/Ravens_World
Summary: "In this world, there are some very good people; people who are too kind for this world, too gentle, too quick to forgive-""Like Buck?"Eddie smiled softly. "Like Buck," he confirmed. "And when we have someone like that in our lives, sometimes, we take them for granted, we start getting so used to how quick they forgive, that we start getting careless with their feelings."
Relationships: Christopher Diaz & Eddie Diaz (9-1-1 TV), Evan "Buck" Buckley & Christopher Diaz (9-1-1 TV), Evan "Buck" Buckley & Howie "Chimney" Han, Evan "Buck" Buckley/Eddie Diaz (9-1-1 TV)
Comments: 22
Kudos: 383
Collections: 9-1-1 Tales





	i will write the stars for you

**Author's Note:**

> Hey, Buddie fandom ❤
> 
> This is a fill for this prompt:  
> Welcome back to the Buddie fandom!! Could I please request Buck is still feeling hurt about the comment Chim made “I like to operate under the assumption that nothing he says is serious.” and everyone grins at that. Eddie's comments at the grocery store, the team's teasing, Eddie's parents about the tsunami, the team about the catfishing and Buck 1.1 Christopher notices and questions Eddie about why Buck is sad. (established relationship, insecure Buck, caring Eddie)?
> 
> I know it's been done before, but I think I deal with it a little bit differently? At least I hope so? Anyways, 
> 
> Happy reading!!

  
"Eddie?" 

Eddie's head snapped up at the sound of his name and his shoulders dropped in relief at the fact that he'd managed to get the captain alone, finally. 

"Hey, Cap, you don't mind if Buck and I went out for lunch, do you?"

Bobby's brows furrowed. "Everything okay?"

Eddie shifted uncomfortably. "Yeah, just- we had a stupid fight this morning and I said some stuff I shouldn't have-" he snapped his jaw shut and forced himself to take a deep breath. He cleared his throat and continued, "so I thought I'd make it up to him, you know?"

"That's a good idea," his captain smiled. "You two can take a lunch brake in an hour or so, but only if things quiet down by then."

Eddie nodded. "Thanks, cap."

"No problem." Bobby patted him on the back then made his way into his office. "Eddie," he called just as Eddie was about to walk away. 

Eddie turned to him with a questioning look. "Yeah, cap?"

"I know I was a bit hard on you two, when you told me about your relationship, so I don't know if I've said it yet," the small smile on his face stretched into a grin, "I'm happy for you, and I'm glad you're making it work."

Eddie smiled so wide his cheeks hurt. "Thanks, Cap."

* * *

"-I actually can't believe you lasted this long," Chimney was saying as Eddie entered the break room, a huge, teasing smile on his face. When he saw Eddie, he pointed at him. "Eddie, man, we were just talking about you!"

"Oh, yeah?" Eddie looked from Chimney to Buck, noting the odd tension in the room. Buck was shaking his head, his lips pressed together tightly. 

"Yep. Was wondering how you managed-"

"You know what, Chimney, stop, okay? Just stop," Buck snapped.

There was a sudden hush, and Chimney's laughter died down rather abruptly. Buck seemed to regret opening his mouth. 

"What?" Chimney sounded confused more than anything, and Buck wiped a hand down his face. 

He looked like he wanted the ground to open up and swallow him whole. From the corner of his eyes, Eddie saw Hen and Bobby make their way in, but it didn't seem like Buck noticed them yet.

"Look, I know you don't mean anything by it and I know poking fun at me is your favorite past time," Chimney opened his mouth to protest, but Buck just waved him off and continued, "but this whole Buck is dumb and immature thing is getting kinda old."

Chimney's face fell. " _Buck_ -"

He tried to smile, but failedat. Instead, he just looked drained. Eddie wanted to go to him, wanted to hold him and offer him a shoulder or some words of comfort, but he wasn't sure he would be welcome. 

Buck seemed to notice the rest of the team had joined them and instead of stopping there, he continued. "It's not just you, Chim, it's all of you," he swept a hand to gesture at all of them. "I know you guys think it's not a big deal, and I know I let you think that and I _know_ that I never really made it seem like it hurt, but it did. Every single time."

Chimney cleared his throat. "Buck, I'm sorry. I didn't know-"

Buck tried to smile, but he couldn't quite pull it off. "It's okay. Hell, in a minute or two, I'll probably regret saying anything, but I just needed it to stop, at least for a little while."

"Buck-" that was Hen, approaching him with caution, one hand outstretched. 

Buck backed away, and Eddie could see that what he'd said caught up to him and that he was starting to regret it. "Don't- just forget I said anything," he said desperately. "I shouldn't have said anything."

Hen stopped moving towards him, giving him space, and shook her head. "Of course you should have. Hell, you should have said something earlier."

Chimney nodded. "Yeah."

Buck's back hit the wall and he looked to the side. "It's really not a big deal."

"Buck-" Bobby started, gentle, but was interrupted by the alarms sounding. 

Buck was the only one who seemed relieved by the interruption.

Eddie watched him take the stairs two at a time, and only moved when Bobby squeezed his shoulder and urged him to follow his team down.

He my need to do a lot more than just lunch to fic this.

* * *

This was probably the worst shift they'd had in a while, and it wasn't even halfway through yet. It didn't help that Buck seemed to do everything humanly possible to avoid him whenever he could. They worked together seamlessly, but Buck had calmed up. He was basically a brick wall, and Eddie didn't know what to do, because this had never happened before in all the years he'd known him. 

Eddie kept trying to remember their fight in the morning, just to figure out what he'd said to make Buck shut him out like this, but he simply couldn't remember a thing. 

Buck had stayed over last night, and somehow, they'd both missed their alarms and were late to work. Eddie had tripped over Buck's gym bag on the way out and he'd lost it. He didn't remember what either of them had said, but he did remember the hurt look on Buck's face which had made Eddie abruptly stop talking.

Since then, Buck had barely spoken two words to him, and Eddie was alternating between being worried and frustrated.

The rest of the shift was only a little less hectic, and by the end of it, all of them were dragging their feet as they gathered their things. Chimney had tried to approach Buck, but both Eddie and Hen had shaken their heads at him and, exhausted as he was, he didn't put up a fight and left with a quiet "good night."

Hen followed soon after him, and then he and Buck were left in the locker room. "Buck?"

He closed his locker door, his shoulders slumped and turned around to face him. "Yeah?"

Eddie sighed in relief at the fact that he was willing to talk to him. "We need to talk."

Buck was shaking his head before Eddie got the words out. "Not now, Eddie."

Eddie stepped in front of him. "Please, I just- we need to talk about it."

"We really don't, okay? Water under the bridge." He shouldered past him and Eddie scrambled to grab his bag and go after him. He caught up to him quickly and put a hand on his shoulder. 

Buck sighed. "Eddie, we'll talk tomorrow, okay?"

"No, not okay," Eddie snapped. Buck raised an eyebrow and he forced himself to take a deep breath. "I don't want us to go to bed angry, okay? So just- come home with me? Please?"

Buck softened and though he didn't seem too happy about it, he nodded his agreement.

The car ride was painfully silent, and as much as he wanted to break the silence, Eddie forced himself not to. He kept sneaking glances at Buck, though, and five minutes into the car ride, he was leaning his head against the window and was sleeping. 

Eddie was going to fix it. He just had to figure out how to do that.

* * *

When they got home, they were greeted by a smiling Christopher opening the door. Carla was hot on his heels, her bag in hand.

"Hey, you two." 

"Hey, Carla," Buck greeted her with a tired smile, stepping into her embrace readily.

Eddie wrapped his arms around his son and kissed his head, then watched Buck all but melt in Carla's arms.

The second Buck was free, Christopher hurriedly walked over to him. Buck lifted him up effortlessly and kissed his cheek. "And how are you today, Chris?" He tickled him as he walked in the house. Eddie watched them disappear into the living room, then looked at Carla to find that she was giving him a knowing look. 

"What?"

"Everything okay with you two?"

"Long shift," he answered shortly. 

"Uh-huh," she said skeptically, but thankfully didn't say much else. "I'll see you on Monday."

"Yeah, thanks, Carla."

* * *

"Bucky?"

Buck was startled, and Eddie winced as the mug he'd rested on the railing nearly fell. Buck caught it, set it side, then turned and gave his full attention to Christopher.

"Yeah, kiddo?"

"Are you okay?" Christopher touched his hands to Buck's face, and Eddie couldn't help but smile at the instant calming effect his son had on his boyfriend. 

Buck smiled, wide and genuine. "I'm really, really okay, Chris. Why aren't you in bed, yet, huh?" 

"He said he forgot to show you a drawing he did at school today," Eddie told him quietly.

Buck's eyes snapped to Eddie's, then fell back onto Christopher. "Let's go see that drawing, huh?"

* * *

Eddie rapped his knuckles on the door frame, and waited patiently until two sets of eyes focused on him. He smiled at them both fondly and stepped inside the room. 

They'd finished with the drawings and had moved to legos, apparently, and when he fixed them both with a stern look, they gave him equally innocent looks that had him smiling helplessly. 

"Bedtime," he told his son simply.

Christopher, for once, didn't argue and went to brush his teeth. 

"I'll put him to bed, and then we'll talk?" He asked him quietly.

Buck merely nodded. Eddie could hear him talking to Christopher, and then a few minutes later, his son came back into the room. 

Christopher was quiet. He got in the bed silently and watched Eddie tuck him in with a laser-like focus. Both those things meant that his son had something on his mind.

"Something on your mind, kid?"

Christopher nodded. "Is Buky okay?"

Eddie sighed. "Why do you ask?"

"He seemed sad."

"How so?" 

Christopher gave a put-upon sigh. "He didn't smile much. And he didn't ask me about school. Or Lydia."

Eddie resisted the urge to laugh. Lydia was the girl Christopher had a crush on, and ever since he let it slip that he liked the girl, Buck had made it his mission to ask about the girl every chance he got. Buck had somehow managed find a way to tease him about it without embarrassing him too much, and it was the highlight of Eddie's day whenever it happened. 

"Dad?"

"Yeah, buddy," he trailed off, then took a seat on the floor beside Christopher's bed. "Buck is sad because- well, because we got into a fight." At Christopher's concerned look, he hastened to add, "it wasn't even that bad, really! We're going to talk it out, and it's gonna be okay, I promise."

Christopher nodded, but the frown didn't leave his face. "You've had fights before," he said slowly. Eddie nodded, and Christopher continued, "he's never been this sad, though."

Eddie rested his hands on the bed and put his chin on top. He looked into his son's eyes, and felt tears gather in them the longer he looked at him. What had he done in his life to deserve such an incredible kid in his life? "I think I said some things that I shouldn't have."

"Why?"

He was quiet for a while, then he sighed and looked away from his son. "I need you to listen to me very well, okay, kid?"

Christopher nodded seriously.

"In this world, there are some very good people; people who are too kind for this world, too gentle, too quick to forgive-"

"Like Buck?"

Eddie smiled softly. "Like Buck," he confirmed. "And when we have someone like that in our lives, sometimes, we take them for granted, we start getting so used to how quick they forgive, that we start getting careless with their feelings."

Christopher seemed to absorb that, then he put his hand on Eddie's. "You did that?"

Eddie, who hated disappointing his kid with every fiber of his being, forced himself to nod. "I did."

"Are you going to fix it?"

Eddie nodded quickly. "Yeah, I am."

"Okay," he said simply, smiling.

Eddie chuckled and got up. He tucked his son in and leaned down to place a kiss on his forehead. "I love you."

"Love you, too, Dad."

* * *

When he stepped into the livingroom, the tv was on and Buck was sprawled out on the couch, head bent at an awkward angle and knees nearly touching the coffee table. He was sleeping. 

Eddie sat down as close as he could get, and brushed his hand through Buck's curls. The touch, soft as it was, caused his eyes to open. He was still half-asleep, though, because he moved to burrowe closer to Eddie, seeking his warmth. 

Eddie smiled softly and leaned down. He rested his forehead on Buck's temple, and felt him turn his head. Their noses touched, and Eddie couldn't help but lean in close. He placed a soft, lingering kiss on the corner of Buck's mouth and heard the other man let out a content hum. 

Eddie smiled and reluctantly pulled away. "Buck?"

"Hmm?" Somehow, he made that sound like a question and Eddie chuckled. 

"Buck," he called again, shaking him softly. "Let's get you to bed, huh?"

He opened his eyes, smiled at him, then, with each passing second, his smile dimmed and he seemed more aware. He sat up, and rubbed the sleep out of his eyes. "Hey," he greeted him quietly, avoiding his eyes, "sorry I fell asleep."

Eddie shook his head. "Don't be."

For a few seconds, neither of them said anything.

"Eddie-"

"Buck-"

"Go ahead," Buck told him quietly.

"We can go to bed," he offered weakly.

Buck immediately shook his head. "No. Let's talk," he seemed to dread it as much as Eddie did, which was a small comfort.

Eddie didn't want to go to bed without resolving the issue between them, but at the same time, he didn't know what he was doing. He and Buck had agreed, when they started this, that they would talk things out, that they wouldn't let things fester. Buck didn't let him keep things bottled up, he forced him to talk about their issues, and he did his best to do the same.

It wasn't easy, but it was one of the reasons why they worked so well together. 

Eddie cleared his throat. "I don't remember what I said to you yesterday." Buck looked down at the floor, and Eddie slowly reached out a hand to touch one of his. "But what I do remember is the look on your face after I said it. I hurt you, and- I am so sorry, Buck. I-"

"You said I was exhausting," Buck interrupted him. He didn't pull his hand away from under Eddie's, but he made no move to hold it. 

Eddie swallowed thickly and closed his eyes. 

"This is the second time you've said these exact words to me, Eddie and I- I get I'm not the easiest person to deal with-"

Eddie shook his head, horrified. "Buck, No-!"

"Let me finish," he pleaded with him. "Please?"

Eddie nodded.

"I'm not the easiest person to deal with," he repeated, eyes now on the tv, "but, I- I try. It was a stupid gym bag, Eddie. You do plenty of things that piss me off-"

"My socks are everywhere," he interjected quietly, trying to elevate the mood.

It worked, to a degree. Buck's eyes met his and he smiled. "Yeah, they are." Buck looked down at their hands and then turned his so that he could lace their fingers together. "According to my parents, I was always more trouble than I was worth."

Eddie stilled, his breath caught in his throat. This was the first time Buck had mentioned his parents. 

"Hearing you say that- it brought back stuff that I buried a long time ago. Stuff that I don't need in my life."

"Jesus, Buck- I- I'm sorry. I'm so sorry." Eddie slid closer to him and laid his other hand on top of Buck's and tugged until he moved sideways. Once they were facing each other, their knees touching, he leaned in close. "You are not exhausting. You're- you're so, so important to me. You know I'm not good with words, but I'm gonna try, so bear with me, okay?"

Buck chuckled, then nodded.

Eddie pursed his lips, blew out a breath and squeezed Buck's hands to stop his own from shaking. "When I moved here for a fresh start, I was terrified. I didn't know if I was enough for Christopher, and I was so scared of failing him, of having to go back to my parents. But then, I met you, and- my life became so much better." He sniffled and shook his head. "After Christopher, meeting you is the best thing that has ever happened to me."

Buck's eyes were filled with tears at this point, and Eddie freed his hands, then used them to pull him into his arms. "You're worth everything. My life is better because you're in it, do you hear me?" Buck nodded against his shoulder, and though he made no sound, the wetness on his shoulder told Eddie that he was crying. He tightened his arms around him. "I'm sorry I made you doubt how important you are to me."

Buck pulled away and wiped his eyes. He chuckled wetly. "God, it's so stupid-"

"It's not!" Eddie protested. 

Buck rolled his eyes. "I know you didn't mean it like that. And poor Chimney-"

Eddie huffed. "We all needed a kick in the nuts when it came to you. I'm- is it wrong to say I'm glad this happened?" He shook his head. "You should have said something earlier."

Buck raised an eyebrow. "After that stupid lawsuit? Eddie, I was so relieved you guys were willing to take me back that I didn't care what you said to me. I just wanted you guys back." 

"Still," Eddie insisted. "You kept apologizing, when I should've been doing the same."

"It doesn't matter," Buck told him, hands clutching the sides of Eddie's shirt. He pulled him closer, until their foreheads touched. "Thank you," he whispered with a smile. 

"What for?"

"For apologizing." He inched closer, and stopped just before their lips touched. "For caring."

Eddie's hands framed his face and impatiently yanked him closer. He leaned back, forcing Buck to lean forward, one knee on each side of Eddie's. The kiss started out as a whirlwind of teeth and tongues, but somewhere along the way became something gentler. By the time they pulled apart for air, Eddie was laying on his back and Buck was looking down at him with so much love that he couldn't help but drag him back down for another kiss. It was a kiss that was filled with passion. It was the type of kiss that carried a promise for more. Or-

It would have been, if Buck hadn't just yawned into Eddie's mouth. 

Eddie laughed, and Buck buried his flushed face in his chest. He threw his arms around the other man, whose shoulders were shaking with silent laughter now, and pulled him down on top of him. Buck wiggled until he was wedged between the couch and Eddie's body, and hugged him. 

"You want to go to bed?" Buck murmured into his chest

Eddie buried his face in his hair and breather him in, closing his eyes. "In a minute," he told him quietly. "Let's just stay here a little longer."

"Okay."

He pressed a kiss into Buck's hair. "Hey, Evan?" 

Buck stilled in his arms and when Eddie looked down at him, his eyebrows were raised. From the look in his eyes, it was safe to say he liked Eddie calling him by his first name. "Yeah?" He answered after a second, his voice hoarse.

"I love you."

Buck smiled, and his face lit up. "I love you, too."

* * *

"Buck, for the love of god, answer your phone," Eddie whined as he buried his head under the pillow. 

His partner mumbled something, but didn't wake up and a few seconds later, there was silence. Eddie relaxed, only to groan when a minute later the phone started ringing again. He sat up in bed, then leaned over to reach for Buck's phone, making sure to dig his elbow in Buck's side as he did so. 

"Hello?" 

"Eddie? I thought I called Buck," Chimney murmured, and he sounded confused.

"You did, Chim," Eddie yawned. He got out of bed and padded into the kitchen, starting the coffee. "Why are you calling so early?"

"Why didn't Buck answer? God, is he mad at me?"

Eddie smiled. "He's still asleep, Chim."

"Oh," he sighed in relief. "Listen, can we come over today?" 

Eddie rubbed a hand down his face. "We?" He asked wearily.

"Me, Maddie, Hen and Bobby."

Eddie hummed. "Have Hen bring Karen and the kids, too. I'll ask Bobby if Arhena and the kids can make it, too. We'll make a day of it," he added.

"That sounds great!" Chimney exclaimed. "We'll be there by 6? 5:30?"

"6 sounds good."

"Alright, I'll see ya."

* * *

Eddie forgot about the coffee and instead went back to bed. He slid under the covers, and wrapped his arms around Buck. 

"Who was it?" Buck asked quietly, still half-asleep.

Eddie rolled his eyes fondly. "Doesn't matter. Go back to sleep."

"Hmm, 'kay."  
...

Eddie didn't tell Buck about the team coming over, so it was quiet a shock for him when at ten past six, the doorbell rang and he opened it to see everyone waiting impatiently at the door. 

Eddie barely suppressed a laugh at the shock on Buck's face as he watched everyone file in. 

The first five minutes were pure chaos as they all greeted each other and tried to find space on Eddie's kitchen table to put the food they'd brought. 

Buck was holding Nia and listening attentively as she babbled at him and Eddie was mesmerized. So much so that it earned him five minutes of teasing from Chimney. 

When the adults settled into the living room, and the kids were in Christopher's room, Eddie watched as one by one, their team members pulled Buck aside and talked to him. First was Bobby. Their talk took about ten minutes, and ended with a hug that lasted a good minute.

Next was Hen, and though their talk was shorter, the hug that followed wasn't.

When it was time for dinner, Eddie went into the kitchen to take out the utensils needed for dinner. About two minutes later, he heard Chimney's voice.

"Listen, man, I wanted to apologize-"

"Chim-"

"Shut up, Buck." Buck did, and Chimney continued, "I'm sorry if I hurt you. I never actually mean to, you know that, right?"

There was silence, then,

"What, I can talk now?"

Chimney huffed. "Yeah, smartass, you can talk now."

Buck chuckled. "I do know. But sometimes, it's hard to rationalize it, you know? Sometimes, I wonder if you actually do think I'm stupid or immature."

"You're no stupider than any of us, I promise you that," Chimney said, and Eddie rolled his eyes at the apology. Buck just laughed.

"I'll do better, I promise."

"Thanks, Chim."

"I'm actually surprised this worked," Chimney commented. "I had a plan b and plan c."

"What was plan b?" Buck sounded amused. 

"Chocolate cake."

"And plan c?"

"A nephew." Chimney paused, and Eddie nearly dropped the plates in his hands.

"What?!" Buck shouted.

"Or a niece," Chimney said, laughing. He sounded proud.

"Maddie's pregnant?!"

Eddie quickly made his way out of the kitchen and into the hallway the two men were in and found them hugging. Buck had nearly lifted Chimney in the air, and at the other end of the hallway stood Maddie. 

"Howie!" She was trying to look disapproving, but her lips were twitching, and when Buck turned to her, she abandoned the act and laughed as Buck picked her up and spun her around. 

Everyone soon gathered around Maddie and Chimney, congratulating them. Eddie caught Buck's eyes across the room and smiled. 

When he reached him, Eddie pulled Buck into a tight hug. "You're gonna be an uncle."

"Yeah," he breathed, giddy.

Eddie looked at him, his face flushed and his eyes sparkling with mirth and happiness, and could not believe how lucky he was to have met him, to have loved him, and been loved by him. 

"I love you," he whispered the words quietly into his ears.

Buck turned to look at him, and he smiled so widely his eyes crinkled. "I love you, too."

**Author's Note:**

> Please let me know what you thought?! I would love to hear from you!


End file.
